I am finally realizing why I’ve felt stuck and lost for many years.

It has to do with ONE THING that if I would have just did this, my entire life would be different today.

But WHY – why didn’t I do it?

Why have I let myself struggle, play small and not live the life I have imagined for so many years?

I think that the biggest reason I have allowed myself to struggle is that I have thought there was something wrong with me. I wasn’t allowing myself to just BE ME.

Because now when I look back, I can see all the ways I was denying myself the ability to express my thoughts and feelings, and all the ways I held myself back from sharing the real me.

Why do we do this?

Why do we change ourselves to fit the mold of who we think we “should be”?

I don’t even know where I got that concept, even the version of me that I thought I “should be” was self-constructed. It was based on a version of me that I thought I needed to project in order to be liked, approved of, and validated.

However it had everything to do with filtering who I was, the things that I shared, holding back – rather than constructing or being someone I wasn’t

So each day it was holding back parts of me that I believed were unacceptable or wrong

And only sharing those parts of me that I thought were good enough or acceptable

And what’s wrong with that?

Well you don’t get the full picture

And inside, a part of me DIES and withers away

I forgot who this person was for so long

But when it comes to the CALL OF THE SOUL, it never dies

Even if you try to deny it

It always comes back.

I have discovered this still, small voice inside that I keep coming back to again and again, as it holds the very truths of my being

This is the true self deep down inside that yearns to be expressed

That years to be cultivated and cared for

That needs to be given a voice

For me, the longer I deny that I have a calling, a message to share with the world, the way in which I was designed, the further away I feel from myself.

I feel unfulfilled.

But slowly and gently, I am allowing myself to come back home to myself. And I have to say: IT FEELS FUCKING GLORIOUS!!

Underneath it all, I am an artist. A writer. A creator. A teacher.

I am here to serve others through sharing my message.

This is what has always came through me – even in the darkest of times. Even when I didn’t think I could do it. I did.

And now here I am facing a crossroads in my life once again.

The crossroads being — am I going to be brave enough to share once again?

Am I brave enough to let the message be the message?

Am I brave enough to allow myself to BE MYSELF?

Am I brave enough to trust the gift?

Am I brave enough to take the leap?

Am I brave enough to give myself permission to share it all?

Am I brave enough to lean into my truths and share them even if they don’t make sense to others?

And the answer to all these questions for me, is absolutely and unapologetically — YES.

I AM BRAVE ENOUGH.

I AM BRAVE ENOUGH to face my fears.

I AM BRAVE ENOUGH to fight through the resistance.

I AM BRAVE ENOUGH to do the inner AND outer work.

I AM BRAVE ENOUGH to take this leap of faith into the unknown.

What is it in your own life that you are denying, running from, or hiding from?

How long have you been holding yourself back?

And the biggest question of all, is at what COST?

For me, it cost me my sanity, my peace, my ambition and drive. It cost me financial abundance, freedom of expression, the joy of serving others. It cost me fulfillment and flow. It cost me my health. It cost me the feeling of being super LIT UP and ENERGIZED each and every day. It cost me the ecstasy of creation.

I LOST EVERYTHING when I gave up on me, my purpose, my dreams.

And not just the intangibles — I literally lost everything. Financially. Materially. Relationally. I. Lost. Myself.

For me, this is a process of RECLAMATION, of sheer JOY and ECSTASY and EXCITEMENT — as well as TERROR, DOUBT, and OVERWHELM.

But at the moment and every moment moving forward, I will NEVER let the bullshit be bigger than my dreams. Ever. Again.

I have lived without living into my purpose — and I can NO LONGER survive without it.

I CAN NO LONGER LIVE WITHOUT PURSUING MY PURPOSE!

I will die without it.

At least, my soul will.

What kind of life is it when you are not pursuing what is inside of you?

For me, I’ve lived it and I know it’s not a life I am willing to live out.

I am committed to the road less traveled, the soul’s calling, to live out the dreams and imaginations in my mind.

To me, it would bring me joy forever and ever to only just to be able to live out what I see inside of me.

I can’t NOT do it.

It has become an obsession and I will no longer silence the goals and dreams inside of me.

And how about you?

Are you ready to reclaim your joy, your purpose, your soul’s calling?

Are you ready to unleash?

I am in full support and am here to empower you beautiful soul!!

Let’s do this together.

In love & success

xo Lauren Marsh