Disciplining Yourself When It Hurts

Discipline in its simplest form is pushing yourself to do those things that you know are good for you – but you don’t want to do them.

They are HARD to do.

Sometimes it HURTS.

I don’t mean hurt in a physical sense — I mean in a psychological way, it is stressful and difficult to the mind for you to commit and follow through on a particular action… THAT is discipline.

It’s no wonder people have trouble with discipline then. In our culture of fast paced apps and social media, where you can have anything you want at the click of a button, why suffer and struggle and go through pain to develop discipline and forgo pleasure for a result later? It seems anti-culture and against the direction our society seems to be going.

Do not be fooled my friend!

Discipline is one of the most important, if not THE most important skill you will ever learn in your life! And not discipline imposed by some outside force — that is actually a bit easier to follow through on. I mean self-imposed discipline. This is much more difficult… and MUCH more self- rewarding.

In order to continue this discussion on discipline it begs the question… what do you really want? What is it that you want in your life that you do not have right now? Maybe there is something you have been struggling to attain for a while that you just haven’t been able to achieve?

The #1 reason that you do not have it? Discipline.

If you were to apply these simple techniques to your life— you might actually start seeing some results, which is AMAZING, right?! (We will go over these in a moment) But the outcome that you desire is not just the only benefit that you get from applying discipline.

Strength of character, grit, fortitude, clarity, perseverance, happiness, purpose, and many other strong values and character traits are developed along the way.

Let’s now dive into the techniques that you can apply to your life in order to have more discipline in your life:

#1 Decide what it is you specifically want

If you don’t know what you want— how can you actually go after it and take practical steps towards it? This is an obvious step #1 — and then what you need to do next is break it down into practical smaller chunks that can be done in smaller amounts of time.

Many people won’t actually choose or decide what they want and will live in indecision land their whole life— it will be a muddled mess of “well I kind of just want to lose weight” or “I want to make more money” or “I want to have more time freedom in my life” or “I want to have more fulfilling relationships” etc — which may SEEM like good goals but at the end of the day, these are NOT quantifiable in any way, so how can you break them down into action steps in order to achieve them??

So no, you cannot use these goals listed above, you need to be more specific. How MUCH weight and inches do you want to lose? How MUCH money do you want to make specifically per day or per deal or per month? What does time freedom look like in your life, etc? These are better ways to break it down — but when you get more specific about what you want and put meaning and purpose and a really big WHY behind the goals— they will be much easier to accomplish.

#2 Decide when you are going to take action

A dream you never take action on is just that, right, a dream? It will always stay a dream if you never take action on it. You must decide when you are going to take action on it and the best time? Is right now. However I understand you have a busy schedule! And kids! And responsibilities! SO when ARE you going to fit this thing in that you SAY you want? How are you going to create this new goal/dream/opportunity in your life?

The way I’ve always done it is to create practical pockets of time to apply myself— in 25 min increments. That’s all it really takes to get going. It’s a technique called the pomodoro technique (google it) where you set a 25 min timer and you have 1 goal and you just focus on that one thing during that time.

In the beginning of any goal, I feel this is one of the most helpful pieces of advice especially when you are encountering resistance to getting started. You can do anything for 25 minutes. It is the smallest amount of time. If that even sounds too much, start with 15 minutes. 10 minute timer and go from there.

But put this time ON YOUR CALENDAR. Whatever you do— schedule it in. When will you “have time” for this thing? Probably NEVER if you don’t FIT IT IN. Wake up 25 min earlier, do it on your lunch break, do it while your kids are napping or eating lunch, it doesn’t really matter WHEN you do it as long as you schedule it in and then…

#3 Follow Through and Take Action No Matter How You Feel

It doesn’t matter HOW YOU FEEL about doing the thing— once it’s on your calendar and you’ve committed to it… take the DAMN action anyways.

One of my mentors would say, “Remove emotion and do the work.”

Couldn’t say it better myself.

Because the emotions WILL come up — the insidious ones that come from resistance that tell you… You’re not ready. You’re not good enough. You’re too comfortable doing what you’re doing. You don’t need to start today. Wait until tomorrow! You don’t need to do that today. Don’t worry— it’s okay if you don’t start today.

Which may SOUND innocent enough… but they are LIES!!

They are LIES that will keep telling you these insidious and evil lies UNTIL THE DAY YOU DIE and NONE OF YOUR GOALS OR DREAMS HAS COME TO FRUITION!!

They are the voices of the dream stealers, the dream killers, those demons inside that will tell you whatever you need to hear in order to NOT take action on your dreams.

This is when you need to activate DISCIPLINE MODE 2.0!!!

This is when you CANNOT BACK DOWN

This is when you have to STAND YOUR GROUND

And say to yourself, NOT TODAY MOTHERFUCKER

I AM doing this, I WILL DO THIS, TODAY AND EVERY DAY — I will take action on my dreams.

And then you do it— follow through on your action item, no matter what you feel.

No matter what those voices in your head tell you, no matter what the weird feelings inside feel like.

This is quite possibly the MOST IMPORTANT STEP THAT WILL SAVE YOUR LIFE!!!

This is also where lives have been lost.

Not actual literal lives.

But I mean — where purpose is lost, where the spark is extinguished, where people trade their soul for a half-life, a life that kind of sort of looks like a life that they know they don’t like but they SETTLE for it anyways….

Because it is comfortable.

Because it is safe.

Because they are UNWILLING to face their demons.

Because they are UNWILLING to face the resistance straight in the face and tell it FUCK YOU

These people will rest in discontented HELL for the rest of their lives… knowing that their life of FULFILLMENT and JOY and FLOW and FUN and ADRENALINE and LIVING and PUSHING THEMSELVES BEYOND THEIR LIMITS…. Is just beyond their reach…

It’s always there for the waiting…

But here you are, ready to take it..

But here you are, on the edge of the cliff ready to jump

Are you ready to fly?

That is the FREEDOM that discipline provides.

Even if in the beginning it DOES feel restrictive.

It does feel HARD and scary and difficult.

You MUST develop these skills in order to GO BEYOND YOUR LIMITS and have the amazing life you have dreamed about.

To recap, you must:

  1. Get specific on what you want and break it down into smaller actionable chunks

  2. Decide when you are going to take action and put those times into your calendar

  3. Take action no matter how you feel – no matter what comes up.

It’s really very simple. The hard part is in execution.

Do you have what it takes?

I know you do— now go out there and execute.

You got this.

In love & success,

xo Lauren

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