#1 Hack to Transforming Your Life

You above anyone else deserves your love, care and attention.

Your personal evolution depends on it.

Don’t they say, “put the oxygen mask on yourself first before you help anyone else with theirs?”

So then WHY are you focusing so much attention on everyone else FIRST and not looking after your own goals and dreams?

Do you want to be the best mother, partner, friend, businesswoman, coach, leader, daughter, etc?

If yes… the secret to showing up FULLY in all areas of your life… is to first take responsibility for taking care of YOU, first.

When I was first married and became a mother, I believed that just because I had a husband and a daughter now, that I would be fully taken care of. I allowed someone else to be responsible for my wellbeing — physically, emotionally, financially, etc.

However what I found was that I didn’t choose wisely (lesson learned) and that this person I chose to marry was not even taking responsibility for himself, let alone two other human beings.

I learned quickly that if I was going to be happy, provide an amazing life for my child, and achieve my goals— that it was up to ME.

This toxic relationship that I was in was one of the greatest gifts in my life.

Because I realized at that point that NO ONE WAS COMING TO SAVE ME.

No one was going to just drop in and save me from the mess I had gotten myself into with a man who was unwilling to support his family financially.

I realized if it was to be, it was up to ME.

When my daughter was first born, we were dead broke.

We were going through a bankruptcy because we were drowning in debt (mostly medical bills).

My partner couldn’t keep a job to save his life so we were unable to pay rent and buy things that we needed, like groceries.

I ended up on welfare and WIC. We were always behind on rent, but luckily we were renting from a family member so they just extended our payments out so we still had a place to live.

I remember one day needing to buy toilet paper and diapers, and when I looked at the bank account it was negative. We were bleeding money with all the overdraft charges, and I had no idea when we were going to be able to put money in to just get it to zero balance.

I was terrified most days, just because I had no idea how we were going to survive.

We were so broke, I even hand-sewed cloth diapers for my baby and would wash our clothes by hand and hang them on the line outside to dry.

There came a time when I just said to myself, ENOUGH IS ENOUGH!

I was sick and tired of living a life where I didn’t have choices. Freedom. Power.

I felt helpless and like my life was out of control.

I became UNWILLING to sit back and just LET life happen TO ME.

I desperately wanted to break FREE and create an amazing life I LOVED.

I made a promise to myself that I was going to go ALL IN on my dreams and not give up until I achieved what I set out to achieve.

I knew that I was born for more.

I knew that I had a message deep inside of me and that I was here to share that message with the world.

I also knew that I needed a target— something to work towards, so I dreamed up a vision for my life that was so unbelievable, so out-there and visionary, that I knew if I achieved it, I would KNOW without a shadow of a doubt that my process worked and that I could teach and show others how to empower themselves to change their life.

I wanted to live in California (I was living in backwoods Pennsylvania at the time).

I desired a life of freedom, of choices, of expressing myself creatively every single day.

I dreamed a life where I could not only afford groceries for my family, but healthy organic food every single day.

I dreamed of spending time at the beach, traveling the world, and getting to help and support rockstar clients every day creating their dream lives, just like I had.

I had a long list of things that I wanted to achieve.

I dreamed up what that life would look like while completely ignoring the reality I was living in: financially broke, feeling powerless in a toxic marriage and trapped by my limited circumstances.

I figured that to achieve my dream life that it would take about $10,000 per month to pay for all the things I wanted to create. (This was in 2010 so money definitely went a lot further back then!! Damn inflation ;0)

I set that goal, I visualized how I would feel when I got it, and saw myself in my mind’s eye doing everything I desired. I put myself in the situation in my mind and let my body feel it… freedom, joy, love, abundance, peace. And then I would come back to reality and get to work…

Many times that reality was that I had a suicidal drug-addicted husband, a crying baby, and a stack of bills with no money in the bank to pay.

For years I worked…

I held the vision for what I wanted.

I never let the emotions get the best of me, no matter how much I wanted to collapse in self-pity, pain, and powerlessness of my situation.

I was DEDICATED and COMMITTED to making it work. No. Matter. What.

I just kept going, and little by little I began to achieve my goals.

After a few years (yes, YEARS!!!), another baby later, and a big move to Texas, things started to really take form in reality for me.

My bank account was increasing every single month. I had the most amazing clients who were transforming their lives every day!! I remember hitting $5,000 months, then $8,000 months, and thinking to myself, “THIS IS IT!!”

I purchased a new car. I made travel plans for California. I had my children in the best schools/daycare. I was caught up and current on all bills. I actually had savings!! We rented a bigger, nicer place on the lake. Things had finally turned around!!

I actually made it. And very shortly after, I did leave my husband, we got divorced and I moved myself and my children to San Diego (my absolute dream!!).

It sounds like a picture perfect rags-to-riches story.

Which in some ways, it is.

BUT the reason I wanted to share this with you is that the ONLY reason I was able to transform my life and make my dreams come true was because I did ONE THING and one thing only…

I took responsibility for my life.

I took responsibility for making my dreams come true.

I didn’t let anything or anyone tell me that I couldn’t do it, that it was too crazy or out there, I just focused on my dream and making it come true.

It didn’t happen overnight, there were many sleepless nights and anxiety-ridden launches that failed, and times when I didn’t know how I was going to move forward.

In that process, I became the woman I was meant to become. Strong, resilient, masterful at her craft, and relentless in her commitment to making her dreams come true.

I believe that we all have this potential inside of us for greatness.

Sometimes it does take trauma or tragedy to begin to unlock it, before we are truly able to harness the power of shifting into something greater.

Personally, I used the anger, the hatred, the rage I had against my (ex)husband to fuel my dreams.

Take it or leave it— it worked for me.

I knew that I had two options: either accept where I was at, and stay stuck and in the struggle forever, OR …

I could take massive responsibility for EVERYTHING that had happened to me, and use it to transform my life.

That is my hope for YOU today, beautiful soul.

I know things haven’t been easy for you.

I know there are things you’re struggling with that you don’t let anyone else see.

I know there are BIG dreams inside your heart and soul that are just DYING to be let out.

So what are you waiting for?

You don’t need a catalyst or a tragedy or a big REASON to make that commitment…

You just need to DECIDE.

It all starts with one simple CHOICE to change your life.

Only then can you step up and take responsibility to change your life.

And yes, there is MUCH inner healing work to do along that journey…

But it all starts with one step.

Make that choice today to show UP for yourself — to become the best and HIGHEST version of yourself you can possibly become.

This is absolutely the #1 hack to transforming your life!!

When you focus on this aspect of growth FIRST, everyone and everything in your life benefits from it in the long term.

Trust me, it may not be easy but I promise you it is WORTH IT.

And honestly, if I can do it? So can you.

If you resonated with this post today, send me a private message or comment below what is it that you are ready to take responsibility for and what you’re committed to creating.

And as always, if you need help and support along the path, reach out! I am here to support and guide you along your way. You can’t do it alone.

I love you and I believe in you and your worth.

Xo Lauren